Thursday, 9 August 2007

Didactofeline is angry with me

Mrs Didactophobe was working last night. Our cat was outside. Simple you may think. Ho Ho. At 11.30pm I call the cat in. Just as she is about to come in, she spots a mouse. She grabs the mouse and I have to slam the door in her face to prevent her bringing the mouse indoors.

When I open the door, the cat has dropped the mouse and is torturing it by chasing it around the driveway. I go outside in my bare feet and underpants (not a pleasant sight!) and chase the moggy to try and save the mouse. The cat picks up the mouse and eludes me. She eventually drops the mouse again and I pick up the cat and throw her into the porch. She springs back out the door before I can stop her and we resume the chase. This process is repeated. Meanwhile the mouse desperately tries to hide beside the steps. Didactofeline can't see it. I pick up the cat again and this time manage to slam the front door.

The cat by this time is frantic. She thinks I am mad to interrupt the hunt. She refuses to go into the living room and begins to scratch the carpet frantically. I eventually let her out again: thankfully the mouse has disappeared. The cat finds the spot where she caught the mouse and sits motionless.

Midnight. I see a shape outside the door and think the cat wants in. I open the door and call her name. No answer. Eventually she reappears and consents to be stroked. She then goes and sits in the hunting spot again. I go to bed.

This morning, the cat didn't speak as she came in the front door. Bad sign. After breakfast she glared at me and went off to bed. When she finally surfaced, she was still in a funny mood. When I threw one of her plastic balls at her (which she normally enjoys hunting), she looked at it contemptuously and told me to chase it myself (she has good communication skills). She has not forgiven me.

Tonight. She has gone back to the same spot and is standing guard. It looks as though she will be spending another night outside. I am made to feel a complete bastard because I spoiled her fun. But I did save a life.

I hope we know what we are doing

With this Government's record, I don't have a lot of confidence. However, maybe they will be proved right on this occasion.

On our behalf, the FCO has requested the release of five inmates of Guantanamo Bay. None of them are British, but for whatever reason they have been given permission to live here. According to the BBC article (and they don't normally give a fair hearing to the US), the Americans consider these men to be dangerous and are seeking assurances in that regard. It does not say why they cannot return to their own countries.

"These steps include an increasing emphasis on engagement with third countries over the transfer and resettlement of those detained," the Foreign Office said. Indeed. But why third countries? Why not make efforts to return people to their own countries? Perhaps there are good reasons in these cases but a bit of transparency wouldn't go amiss.

The FCO has assured us "Should these men be returned to the UK, the same security considerations and actions will apply to them as would apply to any other foreign national in this country." God help us, then. The usual actions are to allow foreign nationals to come and go as they please and to hope for the best. No wonder the Americans have doubts about releasing prisoners to us!

Tuesday, 7 August 2007

New Labour bans Churchill

Browsing the e-petitions to our esteemed Prime Minister (joke!) I thought it would be a jolly wheeze to look at some which had been banned. One in particular caught my eye: Ban the Koran

Why was this banned? Because "it contained language which is offensive, intemperate, or provocative".

And the language was? A quote from our greatest ever leader, Winston Churchill, on the dangers of what he called Mohammedanism.

Admittedly, Winston was offensive, intemperate and provocative. He also protected the freedom which allows some snivelling, Marxist pen-pusher to decide that his words are not fit for the current incumbent of 10 Downing Street to bother with.

Interview me, chaps

David Anstee is a teacher. He is not an elected councillor or MP and he has not played any significant role in drafting Tory policies.

I am a teacher. I am not an elected councillor or MP and I have not played any significant role in drafting Tory policies.

David Anstee's support for Labour is considered newsworthy by the BBC and in some way embarrassing for the Tories. Quotes from him are considered relevant to political debate.

Presumably my support for the Tories will be newsworthy for the BBC and and in some way embarrassing for Labour. Do they plan to use quotes from me? Do they heck! It's a conspiracy, I tell you...

I've had a Brazilian

Now the Clustrmap seems to be ahead of the StatCounter. It appears to have picked up on visitors from Brazil and Germany which the other hasn't.

Anyhoo, greetings to all my guests!

Monday, 6 August 2007

What do the United States, Canada, Costa Rica, Argentina, Italy and Turkey have in common?

They are locations of people who have visited my humble and dismal ramblings. I must say that the Clustrmap takes a little while to catch up with new locations after StatCounter has alerted me to them. Ho hum.

Thick blue line

Christian Voice reports that a 'police advisory body' (ie paid for by your taxes, which you wrongly assumed was for prosecuting crime) mistakenly linked to a spoof website which mocks the modern tendency for police to follow in the honourable tradition of the KGB, Gestapo, Stasi etc and invent laws on the hoof to criminalise so-called enemies of the state. ROFL.

I hope they will forgive me if I quote some of the text:

"Our TRUE VISION is to eliminate hate thought. The police want intelligence on all those who harbour hate thoughts - or even slight misgivings - about protected individuals and groups. Loss of hate intelligence is a loss we cannot afford.

POLICE INTELLIGENCE IN FULL
True Vision Police entirely support Mr Blunkett's wise and careful denunciation of "far-right evangelical Christians." We gave him details of all the murder plots evangelical Christians are planning in the United Kingdom at this very moment against those whose faith they reject. We informed him from intelligence gathering precisely how many church Sunday Schools are secretly training children to be suicide bombers. We told him how many evangelical Christians have been identified at weapons-training camps we know are held every spring in Skegness and Minehead. The heat is on for these violent thugs."

Not a prayer

Archbishop Cranmer alerts us to a report by Christian Voice which alleges that David Cameron has plans to introduce new bank holidays to celebrate Eid ul Adha, Diwali and Guru Nanak's Birthday.

Didactophobe has already replied to this outrage and repeats his answer thus:

"Eid ul Adha is a festival based on a belief which fundamentally contradicts the Christian and Jewish scriptures. Muslims teach that Abraham was instructed to sacrifice Ishmael, not Isaac.

This may seem a minor point to your non-Christian and non-Jewish readers, but it is from this that Muslims claim that the Christian and Jewish scriptures are false; that Ishmael was the true heir to Abraham and consequently the Holy Land belongs to the descendants of Ishmael (the Arabs) and not the descendants of Isaac (the Jews).

To make this a national holiday would therefore be a fundamental attack on Christian and Jewish beliefs and effectively elevate Islam to be the de facto state religion. It is no minor matter, as the Muslims are well aware.

Diwali is essentially an Indian New Year festival. Although it is used by Hindus to celebrate the defeat of Ravana and for the worship of Lakshmi, it is more secular than religious. There is no more reason for the rest of us to celebrate Diwali than to celebrate Chinese New Year. I can see little harm in them, but little point in making them public holidays."

Lefties play the race card (as usual)

As Boris's procession towards the mayorship gathers pace, Lefty writers have predictably descended into the sewers to try and smear him as a racist.

Doreen Lawrence, whose son was tragically murdered in a racist attack like lots of other young men, both black and white, is quoted in the Grauniad as saying that 'no informed Black person' would vote for Boris. You may recall that the Macpherson Report proposed draconian anti-racist measures that could have criminalised someone sitting in their own living room shouting abuse at a televised football match. Boris, rightly, criticised this for the lunacy that it was. According to Lawrence, though, this makes Boris a threat to the multicultural nature of London. Take my advice, missus, and actually read a significant amount of Boris's writings. There is no way that he can be described as a racist. Yes, he has said, done and written some careless things. Nothing, however, that merits the smears coming from such as:

These people. They attack Boris for not bowing down to the false god Mandela (not attacking Mandela, just failing to recognise his deification). Mandela was a brave man whose work since being imprisoned has shown tremendous compassion and forgiveness. He was also a convicted saboteur who led a terrorist orgainsation which murdered black people by hanging burning tyres around their necks. Rather than attack Mandela, Boris merely criticises the way in which South Africa has been run since white rule was replaced by black rule. The fact that Boris describes apartheid as 'tyranny' is conveniently ignored by these people.

They also quote at length a debate involving Boris and Clare Short where Boris commits the sin (in lefties' eyes) of failing to admit that Britain invented the slave trade. At least, I think that is what the point is. Conveniently ignoring the fact that no country did more than Britain to end slavery and also the fact that slavery has existed for thousands of years and is still practised today. Of course, if the slave traders are not white they are above criticism - a bit like the black African leaders who sold their followers into slavery in the olden days.

They do mention Damilola Taylor - what should be a salutory reminder that racism, intolerance and discrimination is a much more complex and multi-facteted issue than they give it credit for. The murders of Damilola Taylor, Stephen Lawrence and PC Keith Blakelock were all horrific and evil. The victims are equally dead. The white farmers of Zimbabwe thrown off their land, their families raped, starved and murdered deserve our sympathy every bit as much as any black victim of injustice.

Update: The Marxist BBC is trying to make an issue out of Labour MPs saying they will not vote for a Tory. The loony left really is getting desperate!

Sunday, 5 August 2007

You shouldn't laugh, but...

...it had a happy ending. This cuddly Belgian tourist tried to emulate King Canute whilst on holiday in Essex.